There are two questions that I have come to kinda loathe...
1. What do you do for self care?
2. What do you do for fun?
When I think about self care and what it means to me, I think about things like having nice nails, exercising daily, getting massages, going to day spas, getting regular haircuts, taking long baths, applying face masks, etc.
When I wasn’t doing these regularly, if it at all, I felt like I was letting myself down. Same thing, when people ask what I do for fun. I feel like I should be regularly doing some sporting activity or hobby. When I don't have an answer, I again feel like I'm letting myself down.
Now this doesn’t mean that I no longer do things for myself but I have had to change my mindset. Instead of focusing on "self care", I think about what brings me joy.
As parents we spend a lot of time making sure that our kids have fun and are happy but what do we do to invite more joy into our own lives?
After listening to a couple of Kylie Camps podcasts, there were 2 truths that hit me hard.
- We are responsible for our own happiness. That is not to say that we won't have times in our life that are hard, but more so that we cant rely on someone else to make us happy.
- There are things in our life, big and small, that bring us joy.
Her recommendation was to write a list (mine is more of a mental list), of things big and small that bring you joy. These things don't need to make sense to anyone else.
To give you an example, here are some things on my list.
- Drinking my favourite tea;
- Drink tea from my favourite tea cup;
- I really enjoy using the make up I own at the moment;
- Dancing in the kitchen;
- Listening to music or podcasts;
- Reading a Book;
- Going for a walk;
- Coffee in my Wonder Woman mug;
- Sitting in the sun;
- Wearing my trackies;
- Watching a movie;
- Using my facial oil. It is not expensive but I like how it smells and makes my skin feel nice. I look forward to using every night;
- Difussing Oils;
- Writing in my planner;
- Having alone time;
- Having my own art supplies. Stocking paint pens and Life of Colour have actually encouraged me to be more creative because I enjoy using them;
- Staying up late just to read my book. It is worth being tired the next day.
How has this helped?
These things do not instantly make a sucky day or week better but I go to bed at night knowing that I did something, that was purely for my own enjoyment. I also find myself recognising and seeking out things that bring me joy, more often.
I am the type of person who loves busy days, as much as my slow days and I no longer feel like I am letting myself down because I haven't got a hobby or didn't have a candle lit bath when I probably did need it. Instead I confidently know the things that bring me joy. I do the 'big' things on the days that I can and the 'small' things on the days that I need too.
Your list is going to look different to mine and what brings you joy doesn’t need to make sense to anyone else. Also, some of these things have become easier to do as the kids have gotten older but I hope this helps in some way regardless of what stage of life you are in.
Kids aren't the only ones that should have fun but we are also allowed to have fun in our way, that fits in with our life at the time. Write your own list of things that bring you joy and try to add more of them into your life daily or when you need to.
As a thank you for taking the time to read this blog - I know it is a bit different to what I usually write - use the code JOY to get 15% Off your next order with us.
This discount code will expire on Sunday 18th Sept 11:59PM AEST.
And for a bit of fun, I have created a Spotify Playlist full of our songs that we like dancing to in the kitchen. There are some ones for the kids on there too.